Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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