How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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