he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
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