my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
