Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Hippo gnu deer
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
The Olympian is in my bed
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
