You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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