My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
