she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
