Bisexual people are plain selfish.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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