if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
pop tarts are not kleenex
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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