if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Your cock deserves a montage
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
