hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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