i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Randomize
