Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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