we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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