I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
