is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
We're too hungover to prance.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Randomize
