im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Randomize
