So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
