Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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