Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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