omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
