I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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