You work out of a Hotel?
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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