Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
True but thats because hes a fetus.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
This is the high leading the old right now
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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