don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
