i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize