Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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