U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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