Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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