in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize