At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
tell me about the fingering
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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