i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Randomize
