GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Four minutes until I can fart!
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
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