Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Randomize