How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Randomize
