Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
Randomize
