Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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