When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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