In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Randomize
