My nipple is on Facebook.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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