med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
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