I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
