I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
