Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
