this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
