I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
