it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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