why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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