So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
