I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize